Jun 8, 2010

A Former Prequel Basher Speaks Out!

I am unashamedly a Star Wars fan. Usually the only difference between others my age and myself is that I like all of the Star Wars saga. I will admit that when Episode 1 was released I was quick to be a prequel basher (not knowing how it would all tie up in the end). However, now 11 years, 3 movies, and two "official"(the Samari Jack version is not canon) Clone Wars seasons later I have become quite the fan. Now, as a recovering prequel hater, I have a few corrections to add to the logic of prequel bashing. Note: If you are one of my regular readers, but not a Star Wars fan then this blog will read like gibberish. You may stop reading now if that is you.

Well let's get started with Qui Gon's training of Obi-Wan. Yoda did instruct (not train) Obi Wan as he did all younglings. Qui Gon had to be there to learn the path to immortality because Darth Vader did not seem to know what Obi Wan meant by "Strike me down and I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine".

There are those who would keep Yoda on the sidelines as an Orko like character. How can Yoda train Jedi in all areas when those areas include swordsmanship if he is not capable of fighting himself? He is feeble in the prequels (walks with a cane) but when he relies on the force he can do greater things.

Midi-Chlorians are necessary to answer the question of why the force is strong in Luke's family. He told Leia that his Father, he, even she had it. She heard his cry in Bespin and answered when even Obi Wan did not. Somehow it is hereditary, but only the use of it not the force itself.

Contrary to popular belief, the expanded universe books are not canon. The clone army does not have to be evil cloned Jedi army. Lucas cannot be expected to bend his story around more than a hundred books. The Clone army as a secret army is a great plot because Sidious is behind the separatists who hate Palpatine (they don't know its him) and he is behind the clones as a means to start a war that weakens the Jedi to the point where he can destroy them and declare martial law.

The plot is so much deeper than the original plot where Ewoks defeat the Empire with rocks or that a concentrated laser blast can destroy a planet in a few seconds. I almost forgot to mention that Han gets frozen with his arms tied to his sides but once frozen his hands are up. You've also got the remark by Obi Wan about the Jawas deaths by saying "Only Imperial stormtroopers are so precise..." when they clearly have terrible aim in all 3 movies.

Can we also answer how Luke's torpedos do a 90 degree turn to blow up the death star? Why were the controls for the Rancor's metal door inside the enclosure? When did Luke learn to use his light saber? What about how many times the Millennium Falcon rolls over in space with the unseatbelted passengers standing behind Han and Chewie without a scratch.

Prequel bashers say the dialogue of the battle droids is silly but what of C3POs comic relief or chewbacca's 3 different sounds being understood by Han as a complete language. The fact that a droid army almost took over helps to explains why C3PO and R2D2 were not admitted into the cantina and were referred to as "their kind".

Bashers also love to hate Jar Jar Binks. Jar Jar and Qui Gon's interaction is the prequel's version of Han and C3PO's relationship. They are the only ones in the movie annoyed by these characters and everyone else is sympathetic.

Let's not forget the fact that Leia's home planet is destroyed and ten minutes later and for the rest of the trilogy she is fine and content not to mention it. At least Anakin is torn up about his mother's death.

The true and only missing link between the trilogies is why Leia says that she remembers her mother as beautiful. Unless this plays into something the Force allowed. Since it goes unanswered we will have to assume that it is indeed a gap in continuity.

The bottom line is that we like the magic of what we have grown up with. Kids today prefer the prequels and accuse the original trilogy of being to slow. There are some who are brainwashed by older fans into liking the originals better. My children however do not fall into that category even though I do.

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Anonymous said...

A very good review. Star Wars is magical for people of all ages and generations. I'm glad your kids are enjoying it as much as you do.

Anonymous said...

Dude listen u cant brain wash someone to like Sw i love the original trilogy a lot better than the prequel and im 10

Anonymous said...

Very well written. I might be able to answer one of the questions you had. When the Falcon rolls over, I think Lucas was then trying to simulate the zero G atmosphere. In zero G, there really is no up or down. If you ever see a picture of the Space Shuttle orbiting Earth, it always looks upside down.


Inside Nate's Head said...

Anonymous, I would assume that since you are ten you have parents who like Star Wars as well. Tell me do they prefer the originals or the prequels? You see children pick up a lot from their parents and you may not call it brain washing but it does at least have a subtle effect.

And Randy, do you think zero G atmosphere is still in effect on a ship that has artificial gravity stabilizers, because there are two scenes where gravity is in effect. One is when Leia stumbles and Han catches her and the other is when a tool box falls on Han's head. That was a good idea though if they were in zero gravity like our astronauts

Fungleberry said...

As I see it the sad truth is that the Prequels were made to make money.

Jar Jar was used as tool to lure in unsuspecting children.

The droid army was the only way to keep a pg rating while being able to slash up as much as possible with as many lightsabers as possible.

Yoda was THE Jedi master who trained Obi-Wan. Not one of the Jedi who trained him. Qui-Gon only exists because of the difficulty of filming an 18 inch tall Yoda throughout the course of a trilogy of movies. Only in Episode two do we finally meet a fully mobile non puppet version of the great Jedi Master. To truly understand this, one must understand the nature of filmmaking and the human nature of a need for solidarity with characters.

Yoda is by no means feeble. He only appears feeble and that is the point. It is one of the few things the Prequels almost got right. A 900 year old Master like Yoda has knowledge of the Force like very few others could. He needs no lightsaber because the Force is his ally and a poweful ally it is.

The difference between Knight and Master is the lightsaber. Knights carry and Masters do not. A true Jedi Master knows that the Force is the most powerful defense.

I could go on forever with just my arguments for Yoda's deplorabe representation in the Prequels, but I won't.

Along with a hundred other arguments for why the prequels are garbage, but I won't.

Instead I will tell you a secret.... I was a Prequel supporter in the beginning. In 99 I would rip anyone apart for bashing. I would tell them "Lucas is a master story teller! I don't understand all that he is doing but I know he's going to tie it all together."

What I learned over time is that Lucas is a marketing genius and knows how to trick people to take the money out of their wallets.

The secret is this....

Lucas is Palpatine, the Dark Lord of the Sith behind the curtain pulling all the strings. Fooling many into believing his Empire is the only way to have peace and secure society!

While on the outer edge of the Galaxy the entire population of Kashyyyk is enslaved as punishment for giving aid to the true guardians of peace and justice...

The Dark Side clouds all. Do not... do not understimate the powers of the Emperor.... or suffer your father's fate you will....

Fungleberry said...

All questions of gravity or of any scientific nature in Star Wars are easily explained by one sentence.

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.

Suspended disbelief is a filmaking and storytelling term describing the audiences ability to let go of reality.

I don't need to know how lightsabers work. I also did not need a weak semi scientific explanation for the mystical energy field created by all living things.

The attempt to explain anything like that in any fantasy is asking for trouble. There is no explanation for barrel rolls in zero g. Don't bother.

Tolkien said of writing the Silmarillion that he created far off places spoken about but never shown in the Lord of the Rings. He was very worried that in revealing those mysteries in the Silmarillion he would destroy their magic. His solution was to create more unvisited far off places that would only exist in the mind of the audience as they read his Prequels.

Reveal the secret, destroy the magic.

Keep it secret. Keep it safe!

Inside Nate's Head said...

LOL good stuff! At least when you are a kid, I like the idea of not fully understanding an element of a story because it is fantasy but when the fantasy imposes things like gravity on itself through a falling tool box, I want to see it used across the board.

There is nothing wrong with Lucas making money, the guy could have made a lot more had he not taken YEARS off of his career to raise his kids. He is a genius who continues to revolutionize the way we see movies, video games, animation and more.

So buying into Star Wars is like a voluntary Lucas tax. I pay taxes to the government too. At least I like what I get in return from Star Wars.

Thanks for the well thought out comments everyone :)

Vasili Volkoff said...

This is an excellent article.

I think John Jackson Miller, the writer of the "Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic" comics and the soon-to-be-released "Knight Errant" comics said it best: "It's all Star Wars, whenever it takes place.

Seisrush Ob said...

The rope/item tying Han's hands are frozen and become brittle allowing him to break free as his arms pull upward in a vein attempt to protect from the carbon freezing.

Torpedoes were remotely controlled. We have that technology today.

Rancor was a dumb beast. Can your dog open your locked front door?

Luke learned to use a light saber by beating jawas with sticks on Tattooine. It was all just a matter of learning the shift in balance from stick to saber.

Inside Nate's Head said...

LOL on the Jawa beating. If that was the case they wouldn't have haggled over droid prices they would have simply beat them and took the droids.

Remote controlled torpedos makes sence, had Luke not just turned off the guidance computer.

The point on the Rancor is how did the Rancor's keeper get out each time without getting shut in himself.

If the freezing was fast enough to make ropes brittle then he would already be unconscious.

LOL, They are still great movies! Realistic or not.

Anonymous said...

The only negative thing I have to say about this post is that it contains far too much sense and logic. This is the Internet, please at lease pretend like you are an idiot.

Inside Nate's Head said...

LOL! Thanks.